Dearly Beloved…

Mixer We are gathered here today to mourn the loss of Sprite’s Mixer.

It was a good Mixer and mixed well for twenty-seven years.  A long life for most mixers that had often been pushed to the limit in it’s mixing days to produce double batches of chocolate chip, peanut butter, sugar, and various other types of cookies.

Without fail, Sprite’s beloved Mixer produced batch after batch of flawless frosting’s, cookies, cakes and quick breads until the day it’s gears stripped and it’s churning skills could only produce FAST or FASTER. 

A wonderful speed only if you are a rabbit in mating season.  *blink,blink*

Sprite’s Mixer is survived by numerous recipients of candy’s, cookies and confections, Sprite, The Ark Children, and the stalker Sprite was once engaged to in her early 20’s before she learned the difference between *real love* and *being in love with the idea of love*.

We will all be gathered in the kitchen in about 15 minutes, sans the stalker/ex-fiance (we are still under the witness protection program), to say our good-byes and pay our last respects.

Please feel free to join us in a moment of silence and respect for our beloved Mixer that has done it’s duty well over more years than a Mixer should have to mix.


9 responses to “Dearly Beloved…

  1. My deepest heartfelt condolances.
    I would assume there is a charity that one could make a donation to, in lieu of flowers….

  2. LMAO @ Paul! What a great idea! You want to come to the Wake?? *grins*

  3. I have lit a candle in memory of the mixer. I have also draped a black cloth over my mixer in deepest sympathy.

  4. My dearest Ann, (said with best straight faced blonde look), I knew YOU would understand. Wake to follow. Where should we have it??

  5. Oh dear! It brought back the sadness that lived here when my circa 1953 mixer finally went to the great appliance heaven. My heart goes out to you and yours!

  6. If you’d like, I could sing “Ave Maria” at the graveside service…

  7. My sincerest sympathy. I do understand the loss and in your mixer’s honor, I will not use mine during the mourning period.

  8. Would it be tasteless to suggest a replacement so soon? / ducking and running
    My sympathies are with you in your time of sorrow.

  9. All of you SO crack me up!! Thank You, Thank You, Thank You! All your sympathy and condolences are so well deserved! lmao
    Now, could one of you ship to me, one those mixers you’re not using through the respectful mourning period of my mixer? I was pricing mixers yesterday (I have baking I always do for the homeless shelter on holidays and still owe faux son peanut butter cookies) – and DAMN! To get one with a head tilt, etc.. we’re talking some bucks!! Geeeshhh .. does this mean I’ll have to get another stalker to buy me a mixer so I’ll make him groovy lunches to take to work with him for the next 2 years?? *rolls eyes at self*

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